Friday, March 15, 2013

Like a Kidney Stone

Maggie, Hope, Chloe, Marlena, Kristen and Abigail need a serious intervention because they've got this whole strong, independent woman who stands by her man come hell or high water and goes after what she wants thing all wrong.  If you're the one doing all the fighting, he's not worth fighting for. If a man or woman can't do the same by you that you do by them, hang a sign around their neck that says "Free to any home but mine" and call it a day. Daniel is so not worth holding onto.  John is not worth holding onto right now either. I don't care if he has a plan to bring down Kristen.  Yeah, okay - Marlena throws child-like temper tantrums sometimes, and she pouts so often you'd think there was a piano wire running through her bottom lip and screwed into the floor, but she's still an adult.  If John has a plan, he should let Doc in on it instead of acting like a puckered old asshole.  As for Daniel, that guy is probably the most high-maintenance significant other in all of Salem now that his daughter is gone.  Mind you - Jennifer is coming in at a close second there.


Hope, instead of badgering Jennifer into talking about her problems with Daniel, why not tell us where your fucking husband is?  Remember him?  The only thing keeping you from being Caroline?  Jennifer and that unsightly dress she's wearing don't want to ruin her homophobic, blackmailing kin and his dopey, sociopathic fiancee's special day by being moody over Dr. Second Coming of Christ.  


I'm going to miss all of Vargas' in-cell Cape Fearcapades once he's out of prison.  Sometimes I just like to watch a man doing shirtless push-ups for the hell of it.  I say that without even a trace of sarcasm.


I want to see less of Nicole's "people can't ever change" rhetoric and more of Nicole's rectory fantasies. If I want to watch two people in an enclosed space missing the irony filling up the place like steam in a sauna, I'd petition for TPTB to give John and Marlena their townhouse back.   


I can't believe the opening teaser for today's episode was Brady about to tell Marlena that John and Kristen are having coffee together. Especially since they're not technically having coffee together.  Will Marlena look wounded, lay a heavy-handed guilt trip on Brady, followed quickly by making a snarky remark about Kristen being man-hungry and/or conniving?  Stay tuned!


"Don't mind me. I'm just passing through."

Like a kidney stone.


So Caroline is giving the bible she was carrying when she married Shawn that was a gift from her GABI.  Of course.  Will is gay, so it's not like he's ever going to get ma--- Oh, wait a second.

Will this madness never end?


Kristen's dress is fabulous, isn't it?  Jennifer, take note.

Kristen's plan started to stink a while ago.  Now that John is onto her, it's marginally more interesting, but it's still like Febrezing a pile of dirty socks rather than washing them.


EJ and Sami are always fun to watch, but their conversation confused me today.  Yesterday Sami was ready to run off and beg Stefano for help with the Nick situation.  EJ tells her the last thing they want is to owe Stefano a favour.  Sami says she'll do anything for her son.  EJ tells Sami he wants to keep his distance from Stefano. Sami says she won't let Stefano lure him back to the dark side.  EJ tells her (before Stefano asks) that Stefano will want them to move into the mansion, then proceeds to sort of try to convince her that it's a good idea after spending the majority of yesterday's episode telling Sami that getting involved with Stefano is a bad idea.  Sami, in the meantime, goes from wanting to give a favour to get a favour from Stefano, suddenly doesn't want to give Stefano the favour EJ and Sami aren't even supposed to be sure Stefano is going to ask for.  Remember yesterday when EJ told Sami that they should exhaust all other avenues for getting rid of Nick before going to Stefano?  Neither do they, apparently.  So as you can see, it's all very confusing.

But now for some gushing.  I couldn't love EJ and Sami finally being the loving, passionate, scheming, united front they were always meant to be more.  Sami didn't look even the least bit embarrassed when Rafe wandered by on his way to Gabi's wedding and caught them making out like teenagers on the park bench, and EJ had that deliciously smug little smile on his face.  It was fabulous.  He's looking out for her, she's looking out for him. Perfection.


Hope and Jen look like they should be holding
shotguns. Almost a shame they aren't.

Hope gives Gabi a bracelet that once belonged to Grandma Alice.  Sure, she could save it for Ciara or Abigail, but - pfffft.  Nick's mother, like Gabi's mother, apparently can't afford bus fare to Salem, so they aren't there.  But Nick's mum sent a scarf that looks like it would suit Maggie far better than a 20-year-old girl.  Just when you think three wisemen are going to show up to give Gabi and her unborn baby some frankincense and myrrh body butter from Crabtree & Evelyn, the gift-giving is interrupted by a wedding.

Maggie, of course, isn't there.  This surprises me because we know that she has absolutely nothing better to do unless she's busy somewhere washing Daniel's feet with her hair.  Doug and Julie aren't there either, nor is Abigail who we're still supposed to  believe is Gabi's BFF.  Bo is still AWOL, of course, but I guess the writers are tired of having to come up with ways to explain his absence so they just didn't even bother this time around.

I would say that Rafe is acting indifferent because he's not fully on
board with Gabi marrying Nick, but that would still suggest that even
a little bit of acting was happening here.

I'm sure it doesn't come as that big a surprise that the best part of Nick and Gabi's wedding was watching Vargas putting on his own wedding band before being told he's a free man, even if it unintentionally looked like he and Nick married in prison and now he's on his way to hijack the wedding and reclaim his "bride".


I loved everything about this daydream.  I loved that Kristen had that gigantic, Jerseylicious hair while Sami had that very prim and proper bun, I loved the look on Sami's face while she was working that martini shaker, and the expression on Kristen's face as she swished the martini around in her mouth made me giggle.


In conclusion, here is a picture of John drinking a glass of water at the Brady Pub after having a coffee at Common Grounds and before having dinner out in Horton Square, which may confirm that he is indeed homeless and all he has to keep warm right now is that open-necked shirt and black coat.  Either that or he's working for the SPD.

Everyone is considering moving into the DiMansion except for John, and that's frustrating as arse.


  1. Great commentary, as always, Diggy!

    It's a good thing the DiMera mansion supposedly has so many rooms because it looks like it's filling up fast. It warms the cockles of my cold heart. I'd be more than happy to see roboJohn take up residence as well but, alas, it is not to be.

    I didn't and still don't understand why everyone was showering Gabi with gifts that bear great significance and sentimental value for their families. What. How many bracelets did Alice have anyway? Didn't Lucas supposedly give one to Sami last year when she was using him as the rebound guy? Alice's bracelets must be like Mardi Gras beads held in great vat in the attic to handed out to any person who toddles along into the Horton household.

    Sami's fantasy was pure gold. The hair, the outfits, the facial expressions - just magnificent. It'll be interesting to see how much Sami feels she needs to "suck up" to Stefano and Kristen if/when she moves into the DiMera household with EJ. I'm also looking forward to some Sami and Brady scenes - I almost always find their brother-sister chemistry draws me in, even if I'm not particularly fond of the subject matter.

    As for Ejami, I agree that there were more than a few contradictions between yesterday and today in their conversation. However, I could ignore all of that simply because of the beauty of seeing them conversing and arguing back and forth from a place of unity. Love. It's a beautiful thing. Damn, I think I love them more with each passing scene. Who'd have thought? Oh yeah, it's Ejami . . . not such a surprise after all.

    PS. We should really photoshop some cartoon shotguns in Jen and Hope's hands.

  2. OH Ejami! You had me at E.J. Loved the scenes today despite the convoluted logic. I will henceforth be referring to Rafe as Kidneystone. Love you, love your blog.

  3. I don't get the convoluted logic issue you have guys (and actually Days scene to scene doesn't make sense most of the time..well actually it was so much worse during Highley last reign of terror with the help of Tomlin by the way..Remember when Ej changed everyday his reasons of making this cringeworthy fake Rafe scheme with Stefano and why he decided to marry Nicole at the same time..for this one even Stefano did not get his was a real rightmare, i stopped watching, it did not make any sense what's so ever). Here i kind of get the 'logic' (if we can call that for Days..hum..) Stefano talked to Ej about moving on the Dimansion with Sami and their children just the episode Ej knows that Stefano wants that..and if they want something from Stefano they have to give him something he wants in return therefore..moving in Dimansion. This move also would be one the less 'evil' act/move they could do since Ej and Sami don't want for Ej to come back on the 'dark side' like they As for Ej changing in 1, 2,3 seconds his opnion about involving Stefano in the Will mess..yep it was fast but we saw the scene when he admits that coming to Stefano would be the most effective he changes his mind but we saw when and why..All in all for once the writers were not absolutely awful in their weird most of the time totally absurd 'logic' here.

    Otherwise this week had some very fun moments with Sami and Lucas little bickering, scheming comedy routine at the police Station and the Sami's fantasy friday was awesome, fun fun fun !!

    Right now this soap has some weak links (well the Dannifer story..most of the time..) Will being written as some weak passive little damsell in distress..Gaby..just Gaby.., the Bo missing issue, Chad being just 'here' lol but there are also lot's of fun thing i love the most is seeing Sami Brady being is the most in character (and enjoyable) self she has been in years and it feels good ! Really.

    p.s: Vargas is pretty HOT. That is all.

  4. Well done Diggy as usual. It's amazing everyone is treating Gaby as some Princess from an island. I can't remember the last time someone got married and received so many heirlooms from families that aren't related to them; considering that those very same people are related to Will, know of the drama but yet still stand by Gaby and Nick. :|

    Days seem to be running out of writing material like they have for a few years now but it's more evident at this point. Perhaps Diggy you can give TPTB tips on ways to keep fans engage and not alienate.

    1. Well i find the show much enjoyable than the last few years before actually.

  5. Anonymous, a root canal would have been more enjoyable than DAYS was the past few years.

    Who picks out the clothes for Jennifer? That was AWFUL.

    DAYS was really on a roll but it's slowed down to a snails pace and EJ and Sami were the only scenes worth watching.